Trouble in Tomsk: Drugged, Robbed & Jailed in Siberia

Tomsk City

Eager to experience the nightlife in Siberia, my good friend Danny and I found ourselves in a nightclub in Tomsk. As the only tourists around, we had no trouble making friends; benevolent locals presented us with shot after shot of Russia’s finest vodka. Danny was talking to a gorgeous student at the bar and I was the center of attention on the dance floor. Things were looking good…

But it all went up shit creek. Literally.

We were naive to cruel intentions. Unbeknownst to us, we had been poisoned by a potent and dizzying elixir.

Danny was the first to experience the effects. Sharing a shot with his new googly-eyed maiden, he skulled back his drink which such enthusiasm, the momentum of the glass defeated Danny’s balance and soon he found himself engaged in a prolonged struggle in stay on his legs. He fell backwards, destroying everything in his wake. Glasses smashed and chairs abated. Then, an almighty cataclysm between him, a table of drinks  and the hard floor. Danny lay in a heap. While he was helped to his feet, I was busy trying to stay on mine…

A similar experience

I too started to feel strange. I rushed across the dancefloor to take cover in the bathroom, but just as I entered the putrid hole-in-the-ground my legs gave way. I landed face first into the nearest shit-ridden squatter toilet. Fail. I made several attempts to stand up, but every time ended back squirming in the epicentre of every sludgy turd. Covered in slop, I was powerless to fight the force of this vacuous black hole. I black out. The next thing I remember – I’m in jail.

Danny is panned out beside me talking in circles. My blothed memory recalls the police laughing at my confused Russian. I remember trying to offer bribes. I remember being in a car. Black out…

Next thing I know, I’m waking up in my own vomit in my hotel room with Danny beside. He couldn’t remember a thing! Our wallets were gone, our heads were pounding and our speech was slurred and incoherent.

Overall a pretty good night!

My Hangover

10 Responses to “Trouble in Tomsk: Drugged, Robbed & Jailed in Siberia”

  1. Hansson Says:

    This reminds me of when I was drugged in a touristy disco in the Dominican Republic. Didn’t wake up in jail though, but on a bus in the morning sun some 6-7 hours later, without any memory whatsoever. Sat on a beach for an hour trying to get my speaking abilities back in order, hailed down a taxi, had to get money from a change booth – the woman seemed to be pretty scared when she saw me – (they took my last 20 bucks but left the credit card) and got back to the hotel. Slep for 20 hours. Fun. Examined my behind, don’t think anything REALLY bad happened…

  2. I remember it like it was 80 years ago!!!!!

    I still have the wallet I bought the day after!!!
    What a night!!

    Remember the heads on us the next day?

  3. Fuck, that reminds me of a visit to a disco in nearby Irkutsk (nearby in russian terms). The weirdest club I’ve ever been to. Girls are dancing, boys are ogling them. And there was a room with strippers and some jaded working girls. Didn’t get as drunk as you though 🙂

  4. whats your approach to gaming russians?

  5. mrkillian Says:

    Don’t think you’ve ever told me this story before man… haha

  6. It’s actually not so uncommon in 3rd world countries to get robbed with the help of drugs in the drink. Combine that with the out-of-this-world-stunning female giving you extra attention at the bar… guys fell for it the last 20.000 years of history. lol

    Have fun but watch out. 😀

    • True. But Russia isn’t exactly 3rd world…

      • meh, I guess it is all relative? Some people will refer to NZ as a third world country…. yet it isn’t really even though we’re falling behind.

        Of course for you who has seen the worst of third world countries then it is no wonder you don’t think of Russia as 3rd world too! 😛

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