Boracay Island Guide

Now that's what I'm talkin' bout!

Boracay in a word: Paradise.

Chance of Hooking up: 5 / 5
Quality of Girls: 3 / 5
Smoking tolerance level: 3 / 5
City guide ratings explained

Costs €$£

Beer: Around €.60 for a bottle of San Miguel.
Bed: €5 for a private room in low season.
Bud: ?
Board: €3-4 for most meals.
Budget other: Cocktails for your dates!
Currency Conversion

Overview

Rated No. 1 in my Top 10 Destinations in South East Asia, for me this place is paradise. White beaches, palm trees, turquoise waters and violet sunsets. Ahh! Top it off by sipping Mojitos and listening to an acoustic set with some beautiful Filipina sitting next to you. What more could you want?

The Girls

Two please!

If you like cute Asian girls in bikinis you’ll love this place!  Filipina, Korean, Japanese, Chinese, European – Boracay has it all. It may be a honeymoon island, but they’re plenty of singles around. Not only are the girls here sexy and slim, they’re game too. The island is the premier destination of a country with 80 million people and as a result, the locals who come to Boracay are all about foreign men.  It’s easy to approach any time of the day whether your target is working or chilling on the beach. Bag yourself a few beach babes and you’ll want to return again, and again, and again. Just be careful, the island is small and you run into trouble dating too many girls… (I found that out the hard way). So you want to get laid in Boracay? Here is my my fabulous…

Beach Bar Bedroom Bladder Bounce technique:

1) Give out / get a phone number. Commence txting.

2) Arrange date for a happy hour, somewhere relaxed and near your place.

3) Get your girl mellowed on cheap cocktails. One Mai -Tai will do the trick, these chicks are tiny!

4) Go for a romantic walk on the beach during sunset, find a place to chill on the sand, conveniently just beside where your staying. Kiss her.

5) This point is crucial. Wait for the cocktail to work it’s way through her system. When shes needs to use the bathroom just say.. “Well, you can use mine if you want, it’s just here…” If she has a unusually strong bladder and that fails, just give her some other excuse to enter the room. “I got some pics you should see” or just flat out lie “Oh, there’s something I got to show you!” (ie. my cock). It doesn’t matter, nine times out of ten it’s golden.

6) I’ve just shown you how to get a drunk beach babe in your room and it’s not even dinner time. I think you can figure out the rest.

This technique works well for instant dates also.

😉

Nightlife Recommendations

Nigi’s Nigi’s

Not a bad place to pick up a stray or two. My friend and I both scored here more than once.

Cocomangas

This disco bar by the beach is where the party’s at. Every night here is insane! This is the number one spot to pull. Grab a girl, do some bumping and grinding then take her home and destroy her! But expect to see her there again, this place is often the only option. Need a little encouragement?

Check out this Bikini contest at Cocamangas…

Getting High

Hard to find. This may be the first post where one cannot help. If you want to get high in Boracay, your best bet is to bring some with you. As usually, beware of entrapment by corrupt officials on the island.

My Boracay Experience

I went nuts here. At one stage I had 9 dates in 3 days! One during the day, one at happy hour and one in the evening. That was before Cocomangas! Like Phuket and Bali, I was shaggin’ like a rabbit. One problem – I kept running into girls I had hooked up while I was on other dates! Things turned ugly. I effectively got chased of the island, warned never to return.

😉

Why not check out more naughty City Guides?

12 Responses to “Boracay Island Guide”

  1. “(i.e. my cock)”, oh I cracked up… 🙂

  2. Brazilianguy Says:

    Hey, NM!

    When is the low season in Boracay?
    What kind of game should I run on the beach and in general? Direct?
    Is 2 weeks enough time to get my rocks off?

    • 2 weeks! Try two days; less. I would say one week in plenty for the island, it’s actually quite small. In terms of game, I was pretty direct. The girls will be too so don’t worry! Low season is Mid-June to mid November. I’m sure you’ll have fun here 😉

  3. Your blog is awesome! Keep up the kick ass reviews.

  4. Keep up the awesome, my good man!

  5. I think we’re going to need you to expand on the story about how you got chased off the island. Come on, it’s not like you can’t REALLY go back, the population can’t be THAT small!

  6. I would be careful in the Philippines. I caught herpes
    when I was there.

  7. Your contest submission is great.

    “Let’s change the subject. What do you do?”
    Sounds like she was interested. I bet you banged her later. I mean, you shored her.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: